Throwback Thursday

This #ThrowbackThursday is to two summers ago when it was stinky hot and the horses had figured out a secret hiding place in the trees. It was their go to place for shade and the hide from the bugs.

Junior and Rabbit

Wishlist Wednesday

Wishlist Wednesday

This Wishlist Wednesday, we wish for blankets. The cold snap we've been feeling is definitely a reminder that some of our Sanctuary residents need blankets to keep them warm during the coldest parts of winter. 

Any size, any color, any brand, and in almost any condition (used is greatly appreciated as well as new) are always welcome. The horses aren't picky on what they wear. It's amazing how quickly certain horses can destroy their blankets while others keep them for a long time.

Meet and Greet with Mayhem

If you were on our Facebook page (https://www.facebook.com/BorderlandsHorseSanctuary/) last night, you might have noticed we did a Monday Meet and Greet with Mayhem. For those that might not want to listen to me ramble (and watch the poor video), let me introduce you to Mayhem.

We brought Mayhem in to the Sanctuary as a twofer deal. We really wanted her mother Rabbit but the owner wasn't willing to hang on to the pair until weaning and wanted us to take Mayhem and bring her back when weaning was ready. I wasn't thrilled with the idea so I gave him $50 for Mayhem and she's been with us ever since. That was in September 2011.

At the time Mayhem was only three months old. By no fault of her own, she's always been on the back burner. And that's my fault and cross to bare.

We weaned her in November and I put her in with the ponies. I've been a little shocked as the pictures in this blog post are from Mayhem this week, standing in a pasture by herself. It's something that's never been done. She's always been with someone else and ALWAYS been herd bound. She has always freaked out before now. But with the heat and being stuck with the ponies, I think maybe she was ready for a break. Or she's finally come to an age where she can handle alone time. I think she realizes Rabbit is never coming back and I hope she knows that Lace and Junior will return at the end of the month. But I'm not sure. She seems a little different these days.

Mayhem has had many strikes against her. I guess that's why I never considered putting her up for adoption. The previous owner had bought Rabbit when she was pregnant. She'd been breed to a blue roan stallion and was guaranteed a blue roan. As you can tell, Mayhem is NOT a blue roan. She is the spitting image of her mother, Rabbit.  Both Mayhem's parents were registered but there was a mishap with the signatures on the stallions papers so we never did get Mayhem registered. I should have pushed the issue but I didn't. But Rabbit was only "needed" for the foal and when the foal wasn't what the owner wanted (color only), she too was no longer "wanted". I can't come to terms with throwing away a life because one isnt' the right color and the other only needed to serve a purpose for a short period of time and then was no longer wanted.


When she came to us, Mayhem had no name. I tossed around a few ideas and was going to call her Havoc but my sister suggested Mayhem and it stuck. You see, when we name animals, it always seems to be odd names. Our first little dog, a minpin, we ended up naming Trouble (and it fit). We also named our first rescue, Chaos (and it fit). So if you have a Trouble and a Chaos, why not have a Mayhem as well. It doesnt' really fit her but that's ok. I was told once by an old cowboy that horses with mean and wicked names were the best horses and those with fluffy names were the worst to ride. So far, it holds true!

So besides being born a sorrel rather than a blue roan, Mayhem also had an umbilical hernia. Because she was always pushed to the back burner, I never got it fixed. We have about half the money set aside for the surgery but I still  hesitate. I'm sure people think I'm insane for not getting it done but Mayhem has had a rash of illnesses. I thought she was colicing so I called the vet. Our vet was out of town so I hauled Mayhem to Dakota Large Vet Clinic only to discover that she had colitis. She's recovered from that without any ill effects but it was a learning realization for me because we trailered her there. She'd only been in a trailer two times. Once to come to the Sanctuary and once to go to the vet. You see, she really HAS been on the back burner. I'd only ever taught her to be halter broke and to stand tied...and that's it! Bad horse mom! But in talking with DLVC, the surgery was double the amount that we were told by our normal vet so I was again taken aback and have struggled to come up with the money. There is a big difference between $400 and $800. To some it's just a drop in the bucket, but to us, it's a lot of money that can buy hay.

While we were at the vets during that episode, we discovered that Mayhem also has a heart murmur. So that's why I question doing surgery. Will her heart give out during the surgery and kill her or will the hernia kill her? Which is the lesser of the two evils. For now, I'm still saving up money. I know it sounds ridiculous as we've had her for seven years but every time there was money in my pocket to care for her, someone else got sick. She's always been on the back burner so there she sits. Again, me being a bad horse mom.

I also had her out in the trees one summer and she poked her eye. So now she also has a spot in her left eye that I am sure will give her problems when she gets older. It doesn't seem to bother her right now (she can see perfectly out of it) but I have no doubt that later on it will bother her.

Mayhem is a good horse, she's just been shafted by me putting her on the back burner for so many years. I want to send her to a trainer but that has to be out of my own pocket rather than the Sanctuary's. I also thought it would be neat to take her and Maverick and get them trained to drive because they are a matched pair. I sometimes do a double take and think that Maverick is Mayhem or vice versa (that's how much they look alike). She's a typical red mare and things need to be her way. She's not as easy going as others but she's still fairly easy going.

After she was weaned, I did put her in with the older mares (Queen and Babe). It seemed that by putting Mayhem in with the old mares, Mayhem became old. She learned from all that knowledge and wisdom. I love putting a young one in with the old. It keeps the old ones active and vital and it gives the young ones wisdom and a sense of balance. It's a bit of a game to figure out who to pair with who as far as young and old because we dont' typically have any young ones but when we do, we have to figure out who fits with who and I think the balance worked out for Mayhem (and Babe and Queen).

So that's Mayhem in a nutshell. She's been shafted in life but doesn't seem to let that bother her (she doesn't know).  She's patiently waiting for her boyfriend, Junior, to return but I'm sure Lace will have something to about it.

Mayhem is a fairly easy keeper but we would still love to have her sponsored. You can sponsor for a month ($100), half a month ($50), or a one time sponsorship. You can donate at www.paypal.me/Borderlands. Or if you'd like to help with her training, either donate or come and spend some time with her so she has more handling, other than just me. Mayhem really should be worked and messed with more than what I can do. If you'd like to donate towards her surgery, that would be very helpful. I wouldnt' feel like such a failure for letting her down if we could get the surgery done. Until then, she'll continue to be on the back burner.

Three Weeks

It's been three weeks to the day since we said goodbye to Rabbit. Every time we have to make the decision to say goodbye, it's devastating.


I've been meaning to tell everyone, thank you for your heartfelt condolences, well wishes, loving thoughts, and moral support. It has meant the world to me.


I'm no less worry free today than when Rabbit was alive. New worries take over and become my full focus. Bo has become an issue health-wise. Odd how even in death, life goes on.


I've been watching a few videos today of horses in feedlots with shipping deadlines. I'm not here to debate the feedlot programs, shipping to slaughter, or any of those sensitive topics. I'm only stating it because those horses....those horses don't have anyone to cry over them, lament over their needs and pending end, worry over if they've done the right thing, etc. I know I made the right decision for Rabbit. But I worry about those that I cannot save, cannot help. In South Dakota, we have drastic temperatures. We are heading in to summer and hot temps (well, hot for SD anyway). Is anyone trying to make these "unknown/unwanted" horses comfortable until their end?


This is the thought that constantly rolls through my brain. I wish I could do more, save more, promote more, provide more. But at the end of the day, I do what I can and the Sanctuary horses are fed and happy and I guess that's all I can ask for.


I miss Rabbit and every time I think of Mayhem, I feel a little sadness. Mayhem is the last of Rabbit's lineage. I wont' breed Mayhem. There's simply too many others that need to come in. But Mayhem is her last daughter. Will anyone remember Rabbit in a year? I know I will because I cared for her. But her previous owners, will they remember her? Will they think of her?


I don't know. I must be in a "mood" as my husband calls it. Death is inevitable and with the Sanctuary it's a fact hat is in my face day in and day out as I watch the herd grow older. But it's an honor and I truly enjoy watching them. This morning I let the herd out to pasture. Half moseyed on out and the other half waited for a good five minutes before taking off at a slow lope. It was music to my ears listening to their hoof beats thunder across the pasture. The only better sound is listening to my children's laughter.


I'm sure I'm just rambling and this post isn't making any sense. It certainly didn't go where I thought it was going. But I don't want to forget Rabbit, or any of the others that have walked into our lives, even if it was only briefly. It's amazing how fast time flies. How can it be that it has already been three weeks since we said goodbye to Rabbit. Mayhem still looks for her and probably will for a little while longer. It's a little heartbreaking to watch and listen as she whinnies for Rabbit.


But someday we will meet again. Hopefully not soon as I want to meet more deserving older horses before my time is up.


And I wanted to sincerely thank everyone for their kindness towards having to say goodbye to Rabbit. It makes doing what I do that much easier. I never realize how much I need the moral support until I get a pick me up from a supporter and it truly brightens my week. From the bottom of my heart, thank you for all your help and moral support.

Goodbye Rabbit

My heart is constricted and I'm surprised that I can even write at the moment. Maybe because I don't have to actually speak words it's easier. Thankfully I'm at home for the paying job so I can burst into tears while I write this.


I was afraid that I was getting immune to saying goodbye but I'm not. I guess that's a good thing. I guess that means I'm still human.


I let Rabbit out to graze in the yard this morning because the pasture isn't nearly as lush, what with having Bo on the pasture for the past month. I gave Rabbit her final meal of grain and groomed her to get rid of every speck of dirt. She was such a gorgeous girl. She looked every bit a healthy horse if you didn't watch her walk. Her eyes were doing ok and her breathing wasn't bad...until after her grain. I think she was allergic to some of the grains as well as having summer allergies.


I did do a short video of Rabbit eating but haven't uploaded it yet. The computer wasn't working and I've no energy yet to upload it. I'm afraid I'll burst into tears.


The appointment was scheduled for 9am and I wanted to have Rabbit loaded shortly after 8am so I wouldn't be late and could take my time. Rabbit had other plans. I forget that not everyone is an easy loader. Lightening keeps reminding me of that. I'd only had Rabbit off the place one other time and that was to have her teeth floated when I thought that was the reason for her weight loss and dropping grain. It wasn't, she had good teeth.


I'm sure I spent 20 minutes trying to get her loaded and was so frustrated I didn't know what to do. I played my final loading card and loaded her through the emergency exit on the stock trailer...or whatever that little door is. She loaded like a pro that way. I can't figure out that with horses that won't load through the big stock trailer door will load through the tiny little door that barely fits them. I know I've banged my head on the top of that doorway a number of times.


But Rabbit did load and off we went. I felt bad for her. So many different sounds and sights. So much to take in. Even when we arrived, there was a horse inside the clinic whinnying and she whinnied back. But so much noise compared to what she was used to. I felt bad. Lots of extra stress for both of us.


As always, our vet is quiet, patient, and understanding. He performed the procedure quickly and left me and Rabbit alone afterwards. As he said, the healthy horses take a bit longer to cross over. And apparently Rabbit was healthy. That made me feel a little better. Her shoulder is what ended her life but not taking into consideration her allergies and eyes, she was in really good shape. I'm so used to seeing horses where their bodies can't maintain the weight and they simply start to shrivel up before your eyes. So seeing Rabbit looking so magnificent with such beautiful weight made it even more difficult.


I know I made the right choice but I still wonder. I still question. I still regret.


She had been a castoff from her previous owner, a byproduct of a baby maker like so many other broodmares, but for almost 6 years she was a part of our lives and always wanted. She was misunderstood and had so much to give. She really was a very gentle horse with a genteel demeanor. I feel bad I hadn't recognized that demeanor sooner. Regrets all around I suppose.


I had so much I wanted to do and yet this loss numbs me. Every loss takes a piece of my heart. I am questioned why I would open a Sanctuary and go through such losses willingly. And I always say, It's better to have my heart scattered to the winds than to leave this earth with a whole heart. When my time comes, I hope that I will have done enough, loved enough, and given my all to those I have cared for and hold near to my heart.


It was an honor to care for Rabbit. I can only hope that we gave her the best retirement that a horse could have and that she will no longer feel pain. Run free my genteel Rabbit. We will meet again some day.

Rabbit enjoying her final pasture time

Rabbit Choker Nikki - Born 1993, Sanctuary member September 2011, died May 25, 2017

Goodbye Rabbit. Until we meet again.

Vacation

How is it that it’s May 23^rd? It should be May 3^rd! I’m even more behind than before. I think I’m to the point where I’m a year behind (or at least that’s how it feels lately).

I shouldn’t complain. I am just getting back from a quick family vacation. Before kids, I used to work 40-60 hours on the Sanctuary after the paying job. Of course I was more focused on the horses and not on the paperwork like I should have been. But I wasn’t a non-profit at the time and the horses’ comfort was my main goal (as it still is).

But with kids, I’ve had to reduce the number of hours I spend on the Sanctuary. I’d like to say that I’m ok with it, but I’m not. But I’m not willing to give up my time with my kids. They are little and in a blink of an eye, they won’t need me. Well, wont’ want to hang out with me and will be doing their own thing. So I’m taking advantage of this time in my life. But that also means less time on the Sanctuary and more time with family.

So you’ll be seeing a few more family vacations and since this is my blog (and my life), I’ll try to share some of our adventures. Because the beauty of some the places we’ll be going to this summer are too precious not to share.

For the past two years, we would head out to Badlands National Park in April to take advantage of their free park week. This year we weren’t able to coordinate schedules to go out in April but we did make it! It’s either my favorite or my second favorite vacation. It’s a super short vacation but oh-so-worth-it! I hope to keep it a tradition so that my kids will have the same ideas of tradition and love of conservation that I do.

Gorgeous doesn’t describe the Badlands. We are usually out there in the fall or early spring when the green hasn’t appeared yet but this time it was gorgeous and flowers were blooming! We missed the storms but the clouds made a perfect backdrop for contrast!

I need to refocus and get the horses out on pasture but I don’t foresee that happening this week. I need to divide the pasture and get some spraying done. But the weather is supposed to be rainy and drizzly until Thursday. And I don’t expect to get much accomplished Thursday.

I’m dreading Thursday. I haven’t had Rabbit off the place except once or twice since we brought her home in September 2011. There was never any need except when she needed to have her teeth floated. When she came up lame, I didn’t want to haul her in fear that she’d fall or be super uncomfortable in traveling on three legs. And for those wondering, we will be going to the vet. We simply don’t have enough land to provide a proper burial of all the Sanctuary horses. It’s not my preference but it’s the most economical route to go and I do have to think dollars and cents to care for the other Sanctuary horses. I’m simply going to pamper Rabbit for the next couple of days and try my best to forget about the upcoming day.

Until then, I’ll leave you with a few scenery pictures from the Badlands. I took a ton of pictures so maybe I’ll try to share some more of them.

Near Dillon Pass. I think this is my favorite part of the Badlands (at least for scenery)



Can you count the number of Bighorn Sheep? We actually saw wild life this time besides those pesky prairie dogs.

Normally I never see flowers but I saw this one and a few others. This time of year is so splendid for flora.

Dreaded Phone Call

The call is made.


I'm doing my best not to bawl while sitting in my cube at the paying job.


I hate playing God. But I know it's the right thing for Rabbit. Before the heat and humidity sets in to make the heaves and the eyes go bad and before the ground gets hard to make her shoulder hurt more.


But it still hurts.


Now for a week of crying. The appointment is set for Thursday, May 25th at 9am.


I don't even know how to pamper her. I'm afraid to do any grooming on her shoulders in fear of causing her more pain but she'll be getting lots of attention the next week.


I hate this part of Sanctuary.

Throwback Thursday

Throwback Thursday is a throwback to Rabbit. We'll soon be saying goodbye to her, which chokes me up. 

We would love to have her final expenses paid, as it's always hard to say goodbye and a second whammy when the bill comes in. You can send checks to

Borderlands Horse Sanctuary

PO Box 35

Humboldt, SD 57035

or you can paypal any amount to www.paypal,me/Borderlands

Any amount will help.

Quick Update

It's been a little bit since I've rambled about the goings-on at the Sanctuary. We had a successful Light the Night fundraiser. That has to be my favorite fundraiser because it's so humbling to me to see all those that are being honored.


I've been trying to keep Bo on grass as much as possible. He spent all of Sunday on the lawn grazing. My family came to visit for birthday celebrations and I pulled Chaos out for my nephew to ride. It's fun to watch as kids discover horses and the joys they bring. But while Chaos was being led around, Bo decided that he was supposed to follow Chaos. It was a funny sight. I also had Rabbit out but she doesn't go very far from her herd. Bo gave up following Chaos after once around the yard and went back to hang with Rabbit.


The wind was a bit much on Sunday but nothing unusual. I went to check on Rabbit and couldn't find her. She'd put her self in her stall that doesn't exist! I think she just wanted to get out of the wind. I don't blame her!


Later in the afternoon, my nephew was itching to get back on and ride so I saddled up Rain and took him. There's only three saddles that fit Rain. My normal western saddle, the Australian saddle, and an English saddle. I didn't think fast enough to grab my Australian saddle and my nephew fits best in my saddle so I grabbed the English saddle. I haven't ridden English since right after my daughter was born (over 1.5 years ago) and I only rode for about 5 minutes. I wanted to lift a light saddle (that's why I went with the English saddle rather than my heavy western saddle) for that brief ride. But it's been awhile since riding in an English saddle and then try leading another horse who prefers to eat grass over walking!! And Rain walks MUCH faster than Chaos and his poky gate. But I think my nephew had fun and that's all that mattered. Even Chaos seemed to enjoy himself.

btw: Chaos is MUCH bigger than Rain. This picture is deceiving.

I do think the horses would be much happier if I could spend more time with them like I used to. But for now, I'll hopefully have another helper around the place.


I decided to put Bo in a pasture to see if that would help with his ulcers. I missed a couple of times with his meds so am making up for it now. I don't think the omeprazole has really made a difference. Unfortunately, he's still wheezing and coughing so the cold never went away. But the omeprazole is super expensive and I know the vet is going to suggest another two weeks of treatment. Bo hates the medicine and requires me tying his head down just to get half of the paste in. He's getting better but I don't want to ruin it. So I'm sort of at a loss. I guess I'll call the vet this week and see what they suggest.


I'm holding off on calling the vet for Rabbit. I have not made the decision yet but I'm really only waiting for nice weather. The rest of this week is supposed to be rainy and dreary and I don't want to have to say goodbye with that type of weather. Call it silly, call it frivolous, call it whatever. But I want her last hours and minutes on this earth to be happy and filled with green grass and sunshine. Not rain/snow and cold. That's not the way to leave this earth. So instead I'll wait. She's no better, yet no worse than she has been for the past few months. But she has told me. I'm letting her enjoy some grass on the lawn but she doesn't wander far. It's time. And I know it. But putting all the pieces together is the tough part. I know some will think I'm crazy but the weather plays into it, the paying job has to give me time off, and I can't have other stuff going on. This weekend we have Mike's parents visiting so even if it was nice weather, I couldn't bring myself to make the appointment.


People sometimes ask why I don't get more done. Well, that's why. There's always something. Either there's kids to care for, extended family visiting or doing something, or the paying job. Like last night, it was 9:30pm by the time we finally got the kids asleep and I could sit and upload Light the Night pictures (and fight my computer and phone...technology hates me!). Considering I have to be up at 5:30 am to get ready for the paying job, I can't spend too much time on the computer because I need sleep. I sit all day and read, so I need to be able to concentrate and not be exhausted every day while trying to get through the paying job. So, not as much stuff gets done. Would I love to have more help, Heck Yeah!!! So, if anyone would like to help, just let me know. I'm sure to come up with stuff that needs to be done, even if you don't live around here!!!


So that's what's been going on lately. Trying to keep up the momentum after the Light the Night fundraiser. Oh if only I could add three hours to my day!

Bo Status

Well, I made an appointment to get Bo in to the vet on Monday. My vet is out until then. Have a few suggestions on how to make him comfortable until then so we'll see. All require needles which Bo cannot handle. He'd rather stomp you than even SEE a needle, or require that he eat grain, which gives him an upset stomach. Who knew that a $110 horse would cost so much!?


Now the hard part. Do I go ahead and take Rabbit in as well? Make one trip instead of two? Stop the worry and simply get it over with? But I wanted here to go on a sunny, warm South Dakota day. Not a rainy, windy day. 20mph wind with 70% chance of rain. Not the way I want to send her off this earth. So we'll see. We'll see if she keeps telling me. I'm going to have to move her and the others to a different pen so we'll see if that triggers anything.


I hate sick horses. I hate horses in pain. I hate this part of Sanctuary work. But better that I play God and make the final decisions, than to take the easier route and "hope for a good home" while sending them to auction.


Please keep us in your thoughts. The next few days are going to be emotionally draining for me.

Happy Friday

Junior and Rabbit hanging in their hiding spot

What A Week

It's been a week. The paying job has sucked away all my energy and enthusiasm so I'll try not to be a drag today.


Last night we had THUNDER and LIGHTENING!!! How crazy to have a thunderstorm in March. At least it wasn't thundersnow.


The weatherman had been saying that we'd be getting snow and then rain from Wednesday through Friday. We got a few snowflakes Wednesday but nothing to accumulate. It looked pretty falling from the sky and even prettier as it disappeared when it hit the ground. I was worried about Rabbit so I threw a sheet on her Wednesday night thinking we'd get rain on Thursday and I didn't want her to get chilled.


We had rain. About 20 minutes of light rain/drizzle and that was it. But I was glad I had the sheet on her. On Wednesday everyone in that pen was kicking up their heels. Lace was tearing around and throwing kicks left and right. Mayhem was chasing Penny (or new dog..one of these days I'll tell you about her and in how we got her). Junior even let out a HUGE buck. It was such a big buck that all FOUR feet were off the ground. It was so fun to watch him. He's 29 and feeling fantastic.


Even Rabbit was willing to run and throw a little buck. Her run was more like a very slow lope, but she loped...on her bad shoulder. AND bucked a little. I took it as a good sign.


But after putting the sheet on her and seeing her Thursday night dead lame again, I wasn't sure what to do. So I pulled the sheet thinking that maybe it was putting too much pressure on her shoulder. It's a catch 22. Her shoulder hurts no matter but anything touching makes it hurt more so she lies down. But I'm afraid that she'll get chilled lying down so I put a blanket/sheet on her. But apparently that causes pain. So what's a girl to do to take care of her failing mare?


I ended up pulling her sheet last night and sure enough, a thunderstorm with thunder and lightening rolls through about 11pm. We didnt' really get anything for rain. Maybe a couple of sprinkles but nothing really.


After seeing Rabbit Wednesday, I had hoped that I could maybe let her enjoy the spring and even summer while the ground is soft. But after seeing her yesterday, I'm back to not really knowing when to make the call. I don't want to wait too long but I don't want to end her life if she's feeling better. I hate this part of Sanctuary. And she was off her grain last night too. So now I'm even more worried.


I have TWO horses off their grain...Bo is off his too. So with two horses not feeling 100%, the paying job stressing me enough to make me feel like I'm going to stroke out, and worrying about funds and fundraising for the Sanctuary I've come to the end of my wits and nerves. I'm not really sure how to move forward at the moment. I know it'll get better and a good nights sleep will help everything. It's the waiting and wondering that is the worse. It's been a hell of a week.

Name Game Question #8 Answer

Name Game Question #8 Answer:

There are TWO registered mares at the Sanctuary. Rabbit and Lace

Name Game Trivia Question #8

Name Game Trivia Question #8

Sorry, this one was supposed to go out Thursday morning. So instead it'll be a triple header!

How many of the current resident mares are registered?

Life is Cruel

Sometimes no news is better than good news. Rabbit has two options at the moment.

Option 1: We can take her in and do a muscle biopsy and have the biopsy sent to Iowa State. The vet wouldn't even give us an estimate on how much this procedure would cost. And even if we did get results, there's no saying that there is a cure for what is going on.

Option 2: euthanasia. She's already on Equi-Seq (vitamin E supplement) and buteless. Both supplements are helping but not enough to keep Rabbit comfortable where she can stand without pain.

I know some would be mad for me even considering euthanasia but also consider the following facts:

* She has heaves all year round.

* She has summer time allergies which makes her breathing even more labored.

* She has uveitis in the summer/fall months.

* She's 25 years old (not saying that 25 is old but I'm not willing to make her go through extensive tests just to prolong her life for a few months)

So I have to make a very tough decision. Quality of life is most important. But also, I cannot sacrifice the well-being of the others for Rabbit. If I spend all our funds on tests, etc. there wont' be enough for the rest of the horses. I know I will get blasted by some for saying such things. That considering euthanasia is the cheap/chicken way out. I should have funds set aside for this type of stuff. But we are small, and we really are focused on quality of life. And this Sanctuary is focused on old horses. And we have to let those old horses go at some point.

I always struggle with making these decisions. It's easier when you can see the weight loss and know when it's time. But the ones with pain management are more difficult. When is the pain too much? Are they still comfortable, manageable? What is their quality of life?

This is the part of Sanctuary I hate. Trying to decide what is in the best interest of the horse for quality of life. It's playing God and not knowing if you're making the right decision or not. It's all the what-ifs that pile up and make you cry at night. 

Life is cruel some days.

Terrible Realization

I had a terrible realization yesterday. It hit me right smack in the face. And it was a huge blow that made me step back and in fact brought me to tears.


We are a Sanctuary for the old and the infirm. Everyone is growing older and there is no way to stop the inevitable. You can prolong it but you can't stop it.


The last horse we lost was Babe in September 2013. That was three and a half years ago. That's a long time to go with no stress of making that final decision.


I realized yesterday that Rabbit's time with us is not going to be as long as I'd hoped. We'll see what the vet says but in reality if we can get the lameness issue resolved, she wont' be with us for very many more years anyway. That thought smacked me across the face...hard.


I am afraid we are going to experience a wave of goodbyes.


I hadn't noticed it...well that's a lie. I did notice but turned a blind eye.


Dude is in slight pain. I may start him on buteless as well. But his hips are bothering him. I had hoped with the trims that he would be feeling better. He's not. He's still showing his discomfort. This type of weather always causes him some...ice and mud are no good for a horse with bad hips. But I realized that he too will have a shortened lifespan because of those hips. Another blow that hit me hard.


Then I looked at Lace. She's been off the last two or three days but that's because of her knee. She slips and slides in this mud so I am guessing she did something to her large knee. The farrier looked at her knee and said part of it is hard and part there is fluid on the knee. I'm guessing the fluid is from dealing with the  mud but I can only guess. But she was really sore after the trim... I'm sure she'll be fine tomorrow. She even did her own personal stretches during the trim session so I know she knows all about stretching. I may have to start her on stretches too. But that knee is going to take Lace out as well.


For the first time ever, we'll be dealing with physical ailments instead of old age and not keeping weight on. That's going to be even tougher on me. It's easier to see the weight loss and know when the time is to say goodbye but these ailments that cause pain is even worse to deal with.


But I hate the pain.


I have been keeping a watchful eye on Junior and Jim (29 and 30 respectively). They are both doing fantastic. Junior is actually at the right weight but how long will he last... same goes for Jim. His teeth are in exceptional shape so it wont be the teeth that take him out.


Oh the joys of caring for senior horses. So stressful.

Update on Bo and Rabbit

Bo
It took another set of eyes to realize that Bo has a cold. I knew it but it didn't really dawn on me until yesterday. But it explains a lot. I was blaming it on Lightening but I think it's a cold. It's enough to get Bo off his feed, which is very unusual. So I called the vet first thing in the morning. I love our vet. They do what they can to help keep our vet costs down. How cool is that? Instead of running Bo in, they suggested to first put him on Uniprim for the next week. I have a feeling that it's a pretty severe cold and a week might not cut it. But it's a start and we'll see how he progresses.


We bought a bottle of Uniprim when Chaos stepped on a nail Christmas Eve (are you seeing the same trend I'm seeing?) I'm not sure if we'll have enough or if we'll have to go buy another jar. But for now, we'll start with what we have.


We could really use donations towards another jar of uniprim. It's something we need to keep on hand apparently. We'll go for months with nothing and then BAM, everyone needs to see the vet!


Rabbit
It's never a good sign when your vet says they'll have to research more about what's going on. At least not in my books anyway. Last fall our vet had come out (I didn't want to haul Rabbit lame). Her x-rays came back clean. There as nothing wrong with her foot. I had thought it was ringbone or laminitis or something. But the x-rays came back clean. The vet suggested a good trim. Our new farrier didn't think it was a trim issue. Her feet are flat but that's not what's causing the issue. In fact, there's no way for the farrier to even trim the one foot because Rabbit is in too much pain.


But I think we narrowed the problem down to her shoulder. The vet is thinking it's a muscle issue and the farrier mentioned something similar but didn't want to say that was the problem, not being a vet and all. Did I mention I love our new farrier!


When you touch Rabbit's whithers, she shakes like she'd rolled, gotten up, and was shaking off the dirt. That's with just a light touch on the whithers. I'm not holding out much hope though. Not in the vet finding out the problem, but in finding a solution that will keep Rabbit comfortable. It could be that we need to do daily walking and stretching as that has seemed to help. But it's so hard to ask her to walk when she's three legged lame. I may try tonight hand walking her and even possibly doing a stretch on that good front leg to see if even that would help a little.


I'm desperate to find a solution.

Farrier Visit and Rabbit Prognosis

Last week we had our new farrier out to trim up some of the horses that were long overdue for a trim. I wanted to try a new farrier as our old farrier is looking to retire and was doing trims mostly as a favor. I'd slowly taken most of the horses off his route anyway but that meant that I needed someone to handle the more "challenging" horses, that is those that have ailments that cause them pain. It's not that my old farrier wasnt' good but knowing that he was looking to retire, I wanted to find someone who wouldn't mind tackling the Sanctuary horses. As I am finding out, if you don't have horses that stand perfectly still, many farriers wont' touch them. I don't blame them one bit, but finding a good farrier is hard.


And did we find a good one!!!!


Those that were trimmed last Saturday fell in LOVE with our new farrier. Usually there's a little bit of dancing and pawing. Quiet. Calm. Wonderful. Even Dude who is normally a jerk was on his best behavior. It could very well be that our new farrier is a woman and because I'm typically the only one handling the horses, they respond better to women. Or, our new farrier is just that awesome. Either way, I'll take it.


So the first horse up was Rabbit. She's been off on the right front for awhile now. And when I saw "off" I mean dead lame. I'd had the vet out last year to do x-rays and found nothing in her foot to show she had anything wrong. I had suspected laminitis or ring bone. Nope. The vet said her feet look perfect. There was nothing wrong with them. Well, now what?!?! He suggested she just needed a really good and regular trim (i.e., the polite way of saying be more consistent with her trims). But she's always been a handful for trims. But there in lies the problem....she wouldn't stand still and would pull her foot away almost immediately.


So the new farrier tested her feet out and knew that she only had 20 seconds on the "good" foot because Rabbit was putting all her weight on the "bad" foot. After doing a trim on the "bad" foot, our farrier concluded that the lameness has nothing to do with her feet. Although slightly irregular and not cosmetically looking pretty, there was nothing wrong with either her two front feet.


What's wrong with her then?!!? Her shoulders!!! Where along her assorted life, she somehow hurt her shoulders and that pain is conveying itself in her feet when she's walking. So the lameness has nothing to do with her feet but all in her shoulders. I'd been giving her a Vitamin E supplement because she always acted like she was a touch me not and any time you touched her she'd flinch...not out of worry but out of pain.


The farrier touched Rabbit's withers and kept light pressure on until Rabbit shook, like a horse would after getting up from rolling. The pressure wasn't that much or that long before she'd shake. So it's all in her shoulders. Now the question is what to do.


I need to do some research, and haven't had time yet (been sick with this weird bug and have had sick kids). But do I have a chiropractor work on her (although at this point, I think it would be too much), get her a massage and see if even the muscles could relax enough, or try acupuncture. I tried acupuncture once before on Dude but the experience didn't go well for multiple reasons. But this being Rabbit and not Dude, I wonder if she'd benefit from it. I'd like another opinion but after the farrier and taking Lightening in for a float, the money isn't there yet to do any exploratory testing on her. So for now, I'll start my research and see what comes of it. I know she'd welcome a thorough grooming or massage. Does anyone want to give Rabbit a massage for Valentine's Day?


So I think our farrier is a keeper! After the quick prognosis she did on Rabbit, Rabbit was relaxed and even took a step towards her. Which she normally doesn't do. It was a pleasure to see Rabbit relaxed and WANT to be in someone's space.


The other trims went well. I was a little worried about Dude because of his hips but he behaved like a gentleman. I about fell over because he wasn't a jerk. Lightening was the only one that didn't behave as well. But that's a matter of figuring him out. Although he allows me to pick up his feet, he apparently has never had his feet trimmed. So it'll be something to work on with him. He's also not used to multiple people working on him. He got nervous when the farrier was working near him. It's the same nervousness that he showed when I first hauled him for practice. So I guess I'll need to start working on desensitizing him to other things...and people. I had hoped more from him, but as I look at Mayhem, I have done the same to her...not exposing her to much and she's the youngest in the Sanctuary.


But overall, it was a great experience and I learned a lot. I am looking forward to next month when we tackle some of the other Sanctuary horses.

Weekend Recap

We had a somewhat busy time at the Sanctuary, well more busy than the previous few weeks.


Our new farrier came out Saturday morning to trim up a few horses that were in desperate need of a trim. Discovered that Rabbit's issue isn't her feet at all (although the x-rays had said that before but didn't leave me with any answers). Also discovered that Lightening has a very high abscess. Good thing I have to switch to Rain for the Tri State Horse Expo performance in March. I was going to switch anyway; Lightening isn't mentally ready for the Expo just yet and Rain has been there before. Now to get him into shape. I forget how spoiled I am. I rode Rain for about 2 minutes back in October and I can't remember the last time I rode him before that. After a few little hitches it was like we'd been riding together for years. I love how well the Sanctuary horses adjust and trust.


It rained almost all day Saturday. It started with a drizzle and turned into rain. When does it rain in February?!?! I had hoped to put in hay Saturday but it was already way to muddy and with the added rain, there was no chance.


I even parked the truck and trailer on dry-ish ground Saturday afternoon in hopes that the ground would freeze. I had almost gotten stuck at the drill team practice arena. Luckily the ground did freeze. I went out half way early Sunday morning to do chores and get the truck and trailer put away. We also were able to get the hay in. By the time Mike was done putting in hay, the ground was getting too soft for the tractor. Timing is everything.


Everyone is still sick at our house. I thought the antibiotics were helping everyone but now it seems that although strep throat is leaving the building, a terrible cold has entered. So we'll see how much I get done this week. Mike is out of town overnight Tuesday which doesn't really mean too much but just a few added chores for me. I'm one for routine and it's not routine when he's gone for training. It means juggling chores and making sure everything is taken care of ahead of time.


I'll write more about our experience with the new farrier. She's a keeper!!! And the horses love her. And I'll write more about what we found out about Rabbit. Not really sure where to go from here with her.

Wishlist Wednesday

Out Wishlist Wednesday item is Equi-Seq for Rabbit. She needs the supplement to combat her vitamin E deficiency. We've tried other vitamin E supplements but only this one seems to work. She gets extreme sore muscles if she's not on this supplement every day. We originally thought she was simply a touch-me-not kind of horse but came to find out it was a deficiency instead.

We have to purchase the big bottle of Equi-Seq from the vet. I can't remember the exact cost but I think a jar runs about $60. On the bright side, the jar lasts a long time. We've been giving her this supplement for a few months are are just now getting down on it.

If you dont want to purchase the supplement, do you want to consider a massage for Rabbit instead? I think she's benefit from a good massage to get rid of the sore muscles. I know she's relaxed considerably when I've worked on her. It's always fun to watch her relax and start to feel better.