Not Goodbye but See You Later

I knew it was coming and yet I still turned a blind eye. In my mind my brain knew but my heart wasn't ready. I came home Friday night to discover that our faithful little house dog had had a stroke. She didn't improve. We spent the night with her, snuggling on the couch and called the vet in the morning to make arrangements. I'd known a month ago that we needed to put her down a month ago but neither Mike or I could make that call. We said goodbye Saturday morning. I'm still a little in shock and am heartbroken even though I knew it was coming and had to be done. But I hate saying goodbye. This goodbye was a lot harder than some of the others for some reason. I'm guessing because I spent 12 years living with the same dog and being responsible for 12 years. Only Dude has been with us longer. But it's a little different because Trouble lived with us. She snuggled with us, slept with us, ate with us, went on family vacations with us. She wasn't just a dog, but a family member.

I have dealt with death many times and for some reason didn't understand what others were going through when they lost their beloved house dog. Now I do. We lost LeRoy, my beloved shepherd mutt on Christmas Day 2007 and that was a heartache but the passing of Trouble seems to be an even bigger heartache.

I'm not sure if it's better to plan for it and cry for the few days between the phone call and the actual deed or if it's better to have the shock of making the decision and having to act quickly. I think I'm still reeling but being that Trouble was with us for 12 years is probably the biggest deciding factor. I'm not sure how many times in the past 24 hours I've thought "oh I need to let Trouble out" or "oh her water dish is empty" but then I remember.

And the worst is she gave me the look. That look of "what are they doing to me" just before she passed. That will haunt me for awhile.

So while we continue with our daily chores and tasks at the Sanctuary, our hearts are very sorrowful and we all need time to adjust. If I'm not  posting anything (or at least not posting about the daily activities at the Sanctuary, it's because I dont' want to bring anyone down and I'm simply at a loss for words because I'm still dealing with the loss.)

This is not goodbye but See Ya Later Alligator.

It's a Rough Life

Some days are just so rough.

Stay cool this weekend!

Trouble Time

In keeping with the new year's resolution to post more pictures, here's an Off Topic post. (I need to get horse pictures soon!)

During the summer months we spend most of our time outside. Our little monster dog, Trouble, doesn't get as much laptime during the summer. But we do try to spoil her when we can. While in Tractor Supply the other day we bought a bone for the two outside dogs Farley and Gypsy. Trouble had to check out the bone first.

She happily chewed on the bone and licked the flavoring right off (note to self, don't buy this type of bone again. Trouble left little foot prints all over the floor.

Nope, the picture isn't deceiving. She is just slightly longer than the bone. For being all of seven pounds, she's all T.R.O.U.B.L.E.

Double Trouble

Ok, so normall I only talk about the horses but I took some pics of Trouble the other day and I can't resist sharing.

I actually feel bad. Trouble was starting to not feel good so she curled up in her chair and I started taking pictures. Poor girl... what she has to put up with.

Ever watchful, always on guard.

We finally finished the remodel so now Trouble spends her time in the remodel part of the house. The french doors let in a lot more light and she stands there with her nose pressed against the window watching the world around her... because whatever she sees is her world and she owns it.

It's alway so hard to get pictures of Trouble. She's so small and moves so quickly I can never get a decent shot. The only time I can get a good shot of her is when she's snoozing in the sun or sleeping in her chair. I read some where that min pins are always on the alert and getting in to trouble . And when they aren't moving, they are thinking about getting in to trouble. Of course I read that AFTER she'd already named herself.

Winter Pictures

Alright, so I know I've been complaining about Mother Nature kicking butt and taking names. I finally got a chance to download some pics. I'll continue to throw snow pics on whenever now that I finally have them. But I thought you might like to enjoy just a few winter pics.

Maveric in the big herd. I think this might have been the first day he was in with the big herd. Lucky for me it was pretty quiet. It's a good thing he's come a long way. I don't have to worry about catching him. He doesn't run when he sees the halter (not like some of the other naughty horses here).

Skippy hanging out. Surprisingly Maverick and Skippy like to play. I can never catch them in the act but it's hilarious to watch. Poor Skippy has to deal with snowdrifts that are as big as him. I need to get a pic of him next to the snow drift Mike's busted out a couple of times. Skip wouldn't even have to put his head down to eat. The snowdrift his head level on Skippy.

I know a lot of people must think I'm crazy to be so worried about getting home to feed the horses. Mike and I went for a drive here tonight to check out the snowdrifts. I sure hope we don't get too many more. The snowdrift in the above picture is taller than Mike's Explorer. If that drift blows shut, there's no getting home. There's actually about a half dozen snow drifts that are either at or above car height on this road and the other possible route home.

Since I stayed home today I couldn't resist taking a couple pictures of Trouble. She wasn't too impressed. :-)

Mother Nature Kicking Butt

I'll be the first to admit it; Mother Nature is kicking my butt. I had a hard time adjusting from the 40 degree weather to the 20 degree weather in late November/early December. Then Mother Nature made the temps drop even more.

Mother Nature proceeded to dump almost two feet of snow on us in late December and now in January we are stuck with sub zero temps. I'd say:

Mother Nature: 4
Me: 0

Tommy and Skippy in one of their lawn pastures

I keep looking back through some of the summer pics where the horses look so shiny. At least they look fat and happy now. They may be wolly mammoths but at least they are fat wolly mammoths.

I think Trouble has the right idea. For the next three months all I want to do is snuggle in to my favorite spot on the couch with my blanket and snooze. Maybe I'll peek my head out once in a while to see what the world is doing but otherwise I'll just snuggle in for the long haul.

Trouble snoozing

The weatherman is calling for even colder temps later this week. I'm already struggling with trying to find places for everyone to be stalled. With 20 degrees below zero temps I'm going to struggle even more. I need to start planning my morning chores to make sure I have enough time to get everything done so I'm not late for work.

View looking south of Borderlans Driveway

I can only hope as the sub zero days pass along that we'll yet again have nice weather. That's what keeps me going right now even if Mother Nature is kicking my butt.

I will have to blog about it later but have I ever mentioned I love my family. My sister gave me the best Christmas present ever. I'll keep you in suspense until later! :-)