Eight years ago I was sitting in this very exact room when I found out my beloved first horse had died. He'd been my dream horse (although possibly not my heart horse). Not many can say that their first horse was their dream horse but I can.
With is passing, I started changing my thinking. It took me a few more years to finally pinpoint what I wanted to do with the Sanctuary. Not only did his passing teach me so much about senior horses, but also about the care that went in to him while aging taught me much.
I'm afraid I did him a disservice by not being there at the very end and pampering him like I do the current residents at the Sanctuary. I can't make it up to him but I can make sure that the current residents will always have a warm blanket, a belly full of food, and a place to call home.
The ache of his passing is still there even after eight years. I believe it will always be there as a reminder to never forget your past and those that went before you.
Some ask how I can go through such heartache. I tell them I would rather have my heart scattered in a million different places with each of their passing's rather than have a whole heart and never known their love and compassion.
Each loved one that has gone before me has made me who I am and continues to make me who I am. I want to continue to hold their memory in my heart because no one should ever be forgotten.
May we meet again some day.
My wise old man, Tiny Dictator |
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