Silent Morning

The snow is falling this morning. Luckily there isn't much of a breeze so the snowflakes are almost floating to the ground. The big snowflakes muted any noise (sometimes we can hear the interstate three miles away). The only noise I heard during morning chores was the snow crunching under the horses' feet and Queen's demanding whinny that she be fed immediately.


Sam also seems slightly better. He's still not eating but he's doing better than he was last night. There's still a dullness to his eyes this morning but after one dose of ulcer meds he's already improved just slightly. I'll be going out early afternoon to give him today's dose and then hopefully he'll want to eat something at tonight's feeding.


It's probably a good thing that it was so peaceful and quiet outside this morning. I've had such turmoil in my heart and brain. In the past week, I've had the opportunity to take in two free horses and purchase two very cheap horses. All registered and all young with no training. I know I need to keep my focus on the older horses, but I feel like I've signed a death warrant for all four of those horses. I think two of them will be ok as they are with someone searching for the right owner. The other two, I just don't know. Hopefully their looks will save them, but they'll turn into baby making machines, putting more horses on the earth without a care for their future.


I'm beyond the anger stage with these horses. I'm to the heartbroken stage. I know I am only one person and I only have so many resources. Those resources are being eaten up by the current 17 horses of Borderlands.


It just feels like I should be able to do more. I'm trying to live by the saying "Live with no regrets" but I'm finding that difficult. At the very least, I will regret not trying to wheel and deal with those two young mares. Too many people turn a blind eye and only focus on what they have. I know I should be happy/content with what I have and who I have standing out in the pen. But who is watching out for those other millions of lost souls. Someone needs to be there to remember them. I may not be able to save any horses at an auction, but at least I was there so that they would be remember at least by me. Even when their warrant is being signed by the killbuyer, at least I was there to remember them. Each soul weighs heavy in my heart, knowing that I couldn't do anything for them. Someone put them on this earth, and someone took them off this earth. I am saddened that people don't take more responsibility. I just wish I could do more.