But now that the Back to School ads are starting to come out, people are thinking about school, fall, extra curriculars from school, upcoming holidays, etc. There's less time for horses in the fall and lets face it, winter is almost impossible to ride in our neck of the woods unless you have an indoor arena or your made of steel (well, maybe not steel but you're hard core).
I wish that I could do more. But right now I'm turning away horses. Even with the potential for sponsorships, I'm turning them away. Which makes no sense unless you're sitting in my very shoes (or boots/sandals because I don't want to bend down to tie shoe laces). I don't trust myself. My brain isn't functioning like it used to so I struggle to figure out exactly what needs to be done. The current horses are taken care of but I don't have the brain capacity to bring on anyone new at the moment. I don't trust myself to even drive in town. I can get to the paying job driving back roads but for the safety of everyone, I'm relegated to being Daisy from "Driving Miss Daisy" because I simply don't trust myself. Which means I don't trust myself to bring in another horse at this time because I don't feel like I could do him/her justice in the quality of care. I know it's all baby brain but it's a little hard on the ego.
I know some of what I'm thinking doesn't make sense and what little does, is all muddle with baby brain. It's just about this time of year that I know good horses are losing their lives and its' hard for me to sit back and do nothing. And I know good horses lose their lives every day due to slaughter but it just seems like more enter the pipeline right about this time of year and I struggle with not being able to do ANYTHING. Even if I wasn't pregnant, I doubt I could do more than simply share pictures. But its' so hard to sit and do nothing. I hate feeling helpless when I KNOW I could be doing something but at this point, I'm not even sure what. Suggestions?